Nudging the Laugh Meter Needle
Posted on Fri, Jan 14, 2011
By: Paula Kavolius
Many of you know that Timmy, our third son, has gone to live at his school. It’s a school that helps children like Timmy learn basic living skills.
Although I keep busy and try not to think about how much I miss him, I have come to understand how people can truly make a practice out of “burying their feelings” about the tough stuff. I don’t know how to do this the “healthy way” but I know one thing for sure – when someone asks how is Timmy doing, I don’t want to talk about it. Except perhaps in this blog. Go figure.
I remember back when we found out something needed “further investigating” with Timmy. I thought the doctor was crackers. “Timmy is fine,” I thought. “He’s just chubby and Polish. That doctor must not know any Polish people.” In hindsight, I know that love is blind, but I was in the denial phase and no doctor was going to convince me that Timmy was anything but perfect.
I have since learned so much about our world, myself, and the highs and lows of raising a child with special needs.
When I was in college, some friends called me, “Bob Newhart” because everyone seemed to want to tell me their problems. Nothing bothered me back then and I had an amazing ability to laugh at and with just about anything and anyone. I remember when I really understood how significantly impaired Timmy was my mother called me for a laugh. I distinctly told her, “Mom, the laugh meter died.” I could no longer provide a laugh for her each day as I was no longer laughing. Those were the toughest days.
I will never forget those days and that is one of the major reasons that I have set out to help others that feel their “laugh meter” has died.
During this past year at HOPe, I have witnessed firsthand:
- how respite kept one marriage together
- how respite helped a child who could not speak sentences, learn to sing
- how respite has facilitated the first true friend of a young man
- how respite has given a steady hand to more than 100 families in 35 towns
Every day we make more progress. One-by-one we are changing lives.